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Hurdles in Hindsight
Not everyone can say they knew what they wanted to do with their life from the age of five, but I could. I wasn’t a little girl who dreamed of one day being a princess and the next, a marine biologist. When asked, I confidently answered each time, “a teacher.” You might expect that I came from a long family of teachers, but in fact I didn’t. I was drawn to education as though no other career choice existed. I was drawn to the classroom, the energy, and the light school provided in my life. School filled my life with this magic that I wanted to capture and preserve for other little ones. I excelled as a student, so much so that even after a day of school, I spent hours setting up my own school in my basement. Simply put, a part of me has always identified as a teacher. Without that piece, I would not be whole.
After three years of teaching in my own classroom, I still confidently (and proudly) let others know of my career. It was such an easy decision that my classroom provided comfort in a life of indecisiveness. So it was pretty shocking that after my years of shining in the classroom as a student, and feeling passionate about my role as an educator, I dreaded returning back to the classroom to continue my education in hopes of receiving my masters degree. I lacked the intrinsic motivation that had always pushed me forward. It wasn’t until I sat in front of my first graders one day that I found that motivation. I made a mistake and apologized to my class, letting them know that I’m still a learner too. Some of the students laughed at this idea, their teacher as a student, and I realized that deep inside myself I was somewhat of a fraud. I was sitting in front of my students, encouraging them to become life-long learners, when I myself had not lived out this idea. I went home and finished my application to the Master of Arts in Educational Technology (MAET) program at Michigan State University that evening.
When selecting a program to explore, I found myself back in my indecisive ways. The challenge of technology integration sparked my interest but also scared me based on my minimal technical skills. Although I grew up in an age of technology, technology could easily be considered a weakness, something I shied away from rather than interacted with. I created hurdles in my own mindset that kept me from taking risks. This idea of not being good at technology held me back from even giving it a try. I stuck to creative arts and left technology to my more “tech savvy” friends. The challenge of such a program scared me. I was nervous and unsettled, but that’s when I knew that my feeling of discomfort would lead to change. I invested in myself and my students, to better myself as both a learner and an educator. I overcame each hurdle along my learning journey. In reflection, I can now look back and see how my own education allowed me to leap higher than I ever expected.
Hurdle 1: I'm not good with technology
My biggest hurdle that I had to overcome was my personal mindset towards technology. I viewed technology as something I wasn’t good at and hence, hid from opportunities that could have improved the learning experiences in my classroom. I needed to be comfortable with technology myself, before considering meaningful integration. Fortunately for me, my very first course in the MAET program, CEP 810-Teaching With Technology For Understanding, pulled me so deep into the technology world that I found myself never wanting to leave. The course tasks were interesting and intriguing, and I found myself challenged with creativity, yet feeling safer than ever in a technical environment. I finally began developing my own digital footprint by creating my own blog, filming and uploading videos, and expanding my knowledge base by reaching out to my professional learning network (PLN). Through this course, I found pieces of myself that I didn’t know were missing. I suddenly could identify as a blogger, and not only wear that title but enjoy it! I loved updating my journey and sharing it on a platform with others. I found myself embracing technology as a mode of communication, a connection to the world outside of my view. I learned how to create a bigger PLN and interact with peers online.
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Early on in this course, I was challenged through my Networked Learning Project (NLP) to learn something new using only YouTube or internet forums. I chose to learn different styles of braiding. This project was probably my most memorable task of the MAET program. I dedicated so much time to learning how to braid, using only technology as my teacher. It was at that point that I overcame my hurdle. I no longer felt a deficiency when it came to technology, but embraced my ever-growing skills. I expanded my understanding further when introduced to the Technological, Pedagogical, and Content Knowledge (TPACK) theory developed by Dr. Matthew Koehler and Dr. Punya Mishra. Through my assignment cooking with TPACK, in which I had to slice up veggies for a veggie tray using a pizza cutter, I realized the significance of repurposing technology and intentional integration. Upon completion of this course, I had a complete shift in mindset. I realized I could be “tech savvy” when I opened my mind to explore new things. I took on a leadership position within my school as the co-chair of our Technology Integration committee. These days, I don't rely on others to help with technology...they come to me! This change jump started my entire journey and lit a fire inside me!
Hurdle 2: Curiousity killed the cat (and by cat, I mean student)
Just as I found myself opening up to the idea of technology integration, I also found myself discovering a new perspective when it came to questioning. Previous to my program, I created a hurdle that stopped me in my tracks, one that viewed curiosity poorly and eliminated time in the academic classroom for questions. As a student growing up, I remember never wanting to ask questions because I felt that doing so was a reflection on my understanding. If I asked too many questions, others would think I couldn’t comprehend the material. Similarly, I can recall in my undergraduate program that you didn’t dare ask a question that would prolong the class a minute longer. As an adult educator, I never raised my hand during staff meetings or inquired about policies because “that’s how it had always been done.” Through CEP 812-Applying Educational Technology to Traditions of Practice, I found inspiration to follow my own curiosities and promote inquiry-led learning in my classroom. Not only that, but I also realized how technology could be used to expose our passions. This course began with an in-depth reading of A More Beautiful Question by Warren Berger. The book allowed me to face many realities of our classrooms and understand how questioning has been diminished in our education system.
By understanding the true power of questioning, I was determined to transfer these ideas into my first grade classroom. I was shocked to realize that I had never taken the time to teach my students how to develop beautiful questions. With a small step, I worked with my instructional coach to develop lessons that taught students the art of questioning. These revelations encouraged me to take risks by having my first graders complete independent genius hour projects that centered around a driving question of interest. I even developed an intentional space in our classroom for a “wonder wall” so our questions are never left unsaid. Rather than allowing this hurdle to hold us back any longer and living into the misconception that curiosity killed the cat, I used it as a platform to facilitate meaningful learning and prompt deeper student thinking.
While opening doors to questioning, I was also able to take a critical look at my infodiet and wicked problems that impact my field of work. Specifically, I researched and worked with peers to better understand the wicked problem of personalizing learning. With such a diverse class of first graders, this issue really hit home. Personalizing learning for all students in regards to curriculum, background, and culture can be a challenge. Through this project, I was able to better understand the “why” behind personalized learning and discover ways to personalize learning in my own classroom. I incorporate small guided groups into my writing, reading, and math blocks. These strategy groups allow me to hone in on specific needs and target learning at each learner’s level. This practice is a goal I still work on daily, searching for new ways to meet the needs of my students.
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Hurdle 3: Technology will take over teaching
As I leaped beyond personal hurdles, I stumbled upon one that mainly affected my students, and realistically hindered our learning environment. Once again, I allowed fear to dictate my path. Previous to this program, I viewed technology as a worthy enemy to the classroom teacher. I was combating the possibility of a technology take-over. The thought of technology eliminating the need for educators caused me to close the door to the world as a classroom. In doing so, I thought I was helping my students to stay engaged with face-to-face interactions, but after taking CEP 800-Psychology of Learning in School & Other Settings, I felt a shift in my foundation. This course pushed me to view learning and teaching in different settings. Strangely enough, I’m not certain that I had ever truly taken a deep dive into the background of learning itself. It also provided me with relevant information that could be transferred and applied in my own classroom.
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At the beginning of the course, I was asked to establish a theory of learning that encompassed my beliefs of what facilitated and hindered learning. I found this task to be extremely difficult. I was unable to put the idea of “learning” into words. As the course progressed, I was exposed to different learning theories that molded my thinking. I engaged with this material through different modes of technology, such as discussion forums, Pinterest board, social media posts, and videos.This engagement opened my eyes to the refreshing idea of using technology to enhance the learning experience for myself and my students. When I wasn’t working against technology, it could offer more advantages than I had imagined. At the end of each module I returned to my personal theory of learning and refined it to reflect my new understandings. This solidified the value of visible thinking in an individual’s thinking process.
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Towards the end of CEP 800, I found I could clarify my understanding of learning with ease. This clarification led to a reflection of the implications my beliefs had on my teaching practice. I identified five underlying principles that impacted my philosophy of teaching. These principles included activating prior knowledge, creating authentic experiences, differentiating instruction, encouraging the process, and promoting the idea that we are all teachers and learners. These principles can be seen within my classroom through various routines and structures. Visible thinking routines line the wall of our room to place value on changing our understandings. To encourage the interaction and sharing between teacher and peers, my classroom uses the application Seesaw. On this discussion feed students can post their learning through videos, recordings, and images. As their teacher, I am then able to give them direct feedback. Students can also learn from others by listening to their explanations or commenting on the ideas of their peers. I no longer view technology as the enemy. I surpassed this hurdle by trusting the integration of technology to provide students with more opportunities than I could possibly offer within the classroom. I was able to break out the barriers of our classroom and give my students the world.
My time spent in the MAET program has not only been transformative for my classroom but has bettered myself in ways that I could not foresee. I am completing this program as a changed educator. I have leaped beyond hurdles that once held me back, placed in hindsight where they rightfully belong. Through this program, I have been exposed to new ideas, new opportunities, and new tools that impact my daily life as a learner and teacher. The evidence can be found in my classroom. My experiences allowed me to develop a new mindset and engage with technology in a way that would I once would have thought was impossible. The end of this program may be near, but my journey is not done yet. I race forward with new found passions in my heart and a clear path ahead!